Sunday, November 21, 2010

Breathe blue.

When hurt turns red and a piece of your heart is missing. When the cold bites deep and you’ve got that feeling like you just got out of surgery. When the only way to stay sane is to concentrate on anything else but how you feel. When you count the tiles in the ceiling. When you push the earphones closer. When the first day of winter arrives. When you remember every nuance of every word of every time. When all this happens.

Embrace it. Feel every feeling. Cry every tear. Sob every sob. Because this is what it feels like to have loved.

The haunt.

Sometimes the night is dark and stormy. Sometimes the ghosts of what you had run their fingers down a spine.

And when that happens, you want to turn to the last page. Don't. You'll ruin the story.

The Angel of almost.

Then I was somewhere else, and it was bright. A voice said

"If you'd carried on practicing that song you almost got right, you would've been great. Bigger than the Beatles."

It continued

"If you'd carried on working on that book you almost finished, it would've changed the lives of many, many people."

Then it said

"If you'd tried to reach the one you loved just a little bit more, when you almost had them, your life would've been completely different."

And I asked

"Is this what happens when I die?"

And the voice said


Sunday, November 14, 2010

The place I love, everyday.

This place is in my head and no matter where I run, it's always here, all around me. It's a big room and my voice echoes when I yell, and there are days when I think you couldn't make it to the other side if you tried.

Wake up at 5:45

And in you and in all of us, there is nothing more than the capacity to be a force for, or a force against. And to wonder, how many people wake up each morning and can't decide if they want to save the world, or destroy it.